What I ate on 9/29/10

Shoot. I totally had a cheeseburger and fries from a roach coach!

What I ate on 9/28/10

I ate terribly yesterday! Carb on top of carb on top of carb! Pizza! Cookies! Spaghetti!

What I ate on 9/27/10

I was pretty consistently hungry yesterday. It was rainy so no running and the larder was pretty-much bare. I kept going into the kitchen for handfulls of peanuts and nuts. I even had a peanut butter sandwich.

Finally, around six, I went out for Chinese. I didn't eat all of it but will have some leftovers for lunch.

How to do the First Step in Alcoholics Anonymous

Today, I met with my sponsee about the first step. Here are some questions I wrote down. We had a great session.

1. When and what was your first drink?
2. Was there ever a time when you could take or leave alcohol?
3. When did you begin to realize you didn't drink like other people?
4. Who was the first person to address your drinking? What was your response?
5. When did you start to realize you couldn't control your drinking?
6. When did you start to control your drinking (i.e. only on weekends, only two drinks, only beer, drinking seltzer, "white knuckling it")?
7. Did you ever plan ahead for drinking?
8. What was your life like a week before you went to your first AA meeting?
9. What caused you to pick up the phone and call Alcoholics Anonymous?
10. What were your pre-conceived notions about AA?

With these questions, I hoped to capture some of the madness that goes into alcoholic drinking and why we end up at AA--how we don't drink like ladies and gentlemen. How we don't drink like normal people.

This is only a suggestion. There are tons of ways to do the first step!

What I ate on 9/25/10

More Geneen Roth. I had a cannoli and a bundt cake for a meal. That was very filling. I don't know if I'm ever going to buy another one of those mini bundt cakes but the cannoli are outstanding.

Who knows how much fucking weight I'm putting on. I did my 45 minutes at the track so I feel okay with it.

What I ate on 9/24/10

I had a hammantachen for breakfast and a brownie for dessert. Working my way through the local Italian bakery large selections. I'm not going to have one of the brownies again. It was like something you'd get in a prison or other institution: very ordinary. Which I like! Means I never have to get another one. The hammantachen is all right but no Moishe's. Well, it's not a Jewish bakery.

What I ate on 9/23/10

OMG I had such a craving yesterday for baked goods. I spent all day obsessing about walking over to the Italian bakery and ordering something delicious to take home. I finally walked over there in the late afternoon and got the strawberry shortcake (not particularly good but definately filling). It really satisfied my craving for the sugar and the carbs!

I weighed myself yesterday: 137.2 I've been jogging at least 45 minutes a day for the past week so of course I'm starving all the time. *sigh*

What I ate on 9/22/10

I had some leftover Mei Fun for lunch. That lasted about an hour in my stomach before I was hungry again. Went to my favorite Chinese tex-mex place on Seventh Avenue for dinner. Had the chicken combination plate. I ate all the healthy things first (salad/chicken) and then only about 75% of the beans and rice. I'm a good girl! :) I did eat the fresh tortillas they made. Those are so rubbery good!

I got hungry again around 8:30 and Steve K went out for pizza and brought me back a slice. Well, he said he bought himself too much pizza. He's an odd guy but a sweetheart! He said he'd write grad school recommendations for me. :)

What I ate on 9/21/10

This is not half of what I ate yesterday. I went out to dinner with a bunch of friends and had tons and tons of delicious Chinese food. I know I've taken pictures in restaurants in the past, but I would have had to take a picture of a lot of things and it's just not worth it. So, just assume I ate a lot of Chinese food and about two slices of chocolate cake for dessert and it was AWESOME!! :)

What I ate on 9/20/10

There should be a mug of ice cream in addition to this; I totally flaked on taking a picture. Ooops! I love subway and their low-fat sandwiches and prominent caloric content (although I did get the cheese I held back the mayo).

What I ate on 9/19/10

I ate some crap: a linzer tart and a mug of Breyer's ice cream. I had the linzer tart for breakfast.
I started listening to a Geneen Roth book When Food is Food and Love is Love. I found it online at the enypl. It's okay so far.

What I ate on 9/18/10

Ate a lot of peanut butter on rice crackers with diet preserves. It's one of the few things that satiates me. I like it. I eat one before I go for my run at the track and I feel a billion times better than I used to (mentally). I used to just ruminate over current and past wrongs. Now I think about happy, joyous, and free thoughts!

At around seven o'clock, I needed to get out of the house. I had a huge carb craving so walked to the bakery and got the enormous slice of carrot cake. Not half bad for $2. I love my Italian Bakery!

What I ate on 9/13/10

Back to the dieting. Back to the photographs. Just got back from a fun-filled several days of vacation and eating restaurant meals three times a day maybe more. I need a big fast. I'll step on the scale later after my shower.